Most people do not lie. They don’t want to remember what they said, nor risk giving off a tell, and don’t know how much truth the other person may already know.
Lies vs. Omission
A lie is an active attempt to deceive or mislead. Omission is another method to deceive or mislead, but is passive and does not require any fabrication. Both are attempts to deceive, but require different strategies to uncover. Omission is the most common form of deception, and the hardest to detect.
Since most people omit rather than lie, keen listening skills are a must in order to hear what is not being said.
For example, if someone told you they left for work at 7:30 and arrived just before 8:00, you know that their commute is approximately 30 minutes. If this same person later told you that they left work at 5pm and got home around 6:45pm, if you’re paying attention, you could pick up on the fact that there was a gap in time.
It’s likely true that they did leave work at five and got home a little before seven, so no active lie was told. But since they have not told you what happened during the other hour and fifteen minutes, there is something they do not want you to know. Or they may be skipping over those details for brevity. That’s why it’s your job to probe further to find out what may have occurred during that gap in time.
Since most people do not lie, stop looking for them and start listening for omissions.
What questions do you have about how to tell if someone is lying? Hit me up.
If you liked this article please Like, Share, and Post a Comment. As Managing Director of Concealed Statements I work with men and women who want to increase their deception awareness to avoid wasting time or money and avoid making poor decisions based on inaccurate information.